Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Quoting The Clash ...

"Should I stay or should I go?"

(I have no idea what this picture is about)

Hmm. The decision that has been driving me to the point of insanity. I have less than one week to decide whether or not I will stay in Japan for another year. My method of avoidance has worked up until now but I'm running out of time. I thought I might try a practical approach like thoroughly exhausting the pros and cons of each side, making a mock decision and 'living with it' for a day or two, or attempting to have a controlled dream where the decision would just come to me at 4:00 in the morning. I could always just ask someone to tell me what to do and then do it. Or flip a coin. ¥ That's how I usually decide what's for dinner. Or the Japanese like to play Janken (Rock, Paper, Scissors) to settle a dispute. I could always find a random Japanese person to play with. Honestly, really, Is there an easy way to make this decision?

The thing is there are pluses and minuses to both choices. Aren't there always? And here's what happens when I ask for another's opinion...
If they tell me to stay in Japan for another year, I oppose their suggestion by explaining why I should come home. If they tell me to come home, I justify why I should stay another year. If they tell me that the choice is mine and mine alone, I scowl because I know it's the truth.

I am fully aware of the fact that I am the only one who can make this decision. I am the one that has to live with it and, considering this is my life, I have to determine what is best for me. I get all of that. It still doesn't make it any easier.

Although it's futile, I still want to scream HELP!

"So come on and let me know.
Should I stay or should I go?"

much love
-tara-
xoxo
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3 comments:

  1. AnonymousJanuary 18, 2008 at 12:24 PM

    As you know Tara, only you can decide what to do. Having said that, I would suggest you consider the "stay" alternative. Why, First of all you are young and have no other commitments to hold you back, 2nd You mentioned an Austrailia trip which would expand your "Word Traveler" status, Third, It will be good on your resume and you may aquire "stuff" to use in you Masters Persuit. It is still you decision as you know.. G'PA Steve

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  2. AnonymousJanuary 19, 2008 at 12:50 AM

    babe girl
    Sense you were 5 years old you have been grown or I should say mature. I know you need to decide this on your own and its hard,I think whatever you do it will be fine. I agree with your grandpa Steve and your persuit of higher education. Tara Lynn sometimes you just have to go with your gut and take that next step, whatever it is and if your gut says I need to come home than it's time for the next adventure. LV MOM XXXXXOOOO

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  3. AnonymousJanuary 19, 2008 at 10:10 AM

    I talked to your mom this morning and she told me of your impending decision. She said I should check out your blog again and read it, that you were asking for advice and I AM always full of...advice! Actually, the only thing I am going to ask is where and when are you finding the most joyous moments of your life? answer honestly and and you will have your answer.

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